To tell the truth, i am struggling quite a long time ago, since i came to life, to be precise.
I thought, or was tought to seek comfort at the feet of those who have been in life quite long before i came, they all seemed to have that air of knowing, of understanding, or simply seeing, quite obviously, the truth!! Unfortunately, the older i become, the more are the questions, and the more ignorant they silently stand.
I reach a point where i even fail to realize who is the pathetic among ourselves!! Is it the other, the deceivingly believing ones, or just me, the younger, naive pursuer of truth!!
This issue, also i can not settle down. The answer seems to belong to the hidden secrets-holding holder, at the secret heart of everywhere we can not reach, right behind the secred truth, also remains unrevealed.
If you are waiting, i am waiting too, the only thing we know is that we are waiting, but for what? I know, only know that i am waiting for the box to be uncovered, and so i can go inside, reach through and see the truth.
When?! Where?! and How?! Are the bitterest words language have offered. Since i learnt them my lips have never failed to utter, and my mind, ever since, never stoped to suffer.
Will you deny me now?! after i revealed myself to you baby!! Don't you worry, i can still be a good friend, a good woman, a good sister, a good wife and a good mom. No answers doesnt mean no me!! i am still here, even if things are ceasing to stand clear, my love will never stop floading through, reaching you. I am a very good knowledge pretender, i will let you well believe that i know when i tell you i do. This is i guarantee, and no more.
My Lord, one day, i know for sure You will answer all my questions, i know you have some other to ask me, but i will not even be able to answer them, i simply try to stick to what you made me think. Even if i dont know nothing, i would never hesitate to say that i truely know that You know all of it. Yet right in my mind, you're just raising the questions so i would wonder and ask for the answers. Isn't it so!!
1 comment:
"If you are waiting, i am waiting too, the only thing we know is that we are waiting, but for what? I know, only know that i am waiting for the box to be uncovered, and so i can go inside, reach through and see the truth."
Sounds like comforting that it is not only me who is waiting for something unknown.. Hope it won't be like waiting for Godot!
But i just wonder why you wait for the box to be uncovered?! It sounds like improbable to me that you'd like to get into the box, dear! I won't tell you I won't do it myself.. But as far as I know about you (if i can say i know you) you are not that kinda person who'd imprison herself in the box.. even if it was the desired one!!!
You know? Some people were born to go inside the box.. I believe you are not one of them!
Just enjoy wandering.. It's priceless & matchless..
love
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